I'm writing this blog as a sick person today - gastric flu and sinusitis are a lethal combination and my body is taking a serious battering.
Normally I don't dedicate a post to a specific person but I've decided to go for it today. I'm all drugged up on medication and I guess that doesn't really help. Cue: this.
Now, I don't take kindly to people who just walk in and out of my life when it suits them - I'm sure many people don't. And especially when it's after months of not speaking to me despite my efforts to maintain contact, talk to them but get no response. Then they bleat: "Wow, I see uni has changed you so much!"
Well actually no: I've grown up a bit more and it's the other person's fault for missing out on this step in my development as a person. Maybe I'm playing the blame-game, but in all honesty if the avenue for contact is there: use it!
Don't turn up in someone's 10 months later bleating a sorry case about a load of rubbish. It doesn't wash me or many other people who've been in this situation.
I always believe that changes in a person, should in theory, be for the best. However, I'm well aware that some changes make people worse than they were before.
This person in particular, has recently got married and I am truly happy for him (sounds like I'm not, but I am) because once upon a time, we were good friends and even though his behaviour has been stupid, I respect the memory of that friendship.
I understand that it's a big step: you know, the compromises, changing for that person, the honeymoon period, work, a house - it's a lot and it's a serious situation. I get it, but don't walk in and out of someone's life when it suits you because it hurts the other person. And to be honest, I don't this person has realised how much it's hurt me: I value my friends and hate losing them or saying goodbye to them, but in some situations you have to let go for your sake.
I personally believe that losing a friend, is painful and it's on a par with a break-up in a relationship because you really do open up to your friends and when it all ends, it's a shock. At least for me it is.
I'll always keep that avenue of friendship open, but there's only so much you can do and ultimately it's a two way thing and much of the work has to be done by the other person.
Normally I don't dedicate a post to a specific person but I've decided to go for it today. I'm all drugged up on medication and I guess that doesn't really help. Cue: this.
Now, I don't take kindly to people who just walk in and out of my life when it suits them - I'm sure many people don't. And especially when it's after months of not speaking to me despite my efforts to maintain contact, talk to them but get no response. Then they bleat: "Wow, I see uni has changed you so much!"
Well actually no: I've grown up a bit more and it's the other person's fault for missing out on this step in my development as a person. Maybe I'm playing the blame-game, but in all honesty if the avenue for contact is there: use it!
Don't turn up in someone's 10 months later bleating a sorry case about a load of rubbish. It doesn't wash me or many other people who've been in this situation.
I always believe that changes in a person, should in theory, be for the best. However, I'm well aware that some changes make people worse than they were before.
This person in particular, has recently got married and I am truly happy for him (sounds like I'm not, but I am) because once upon a time, we were good friends and even though his behaviour has been stupid, I respect the memory of that friendship.
I understand that it's a big step: you know, the compromises, changing for that person, the honeymoon period, work, a house - it's a lot and it's a serious situation. I get it, but don't walk in and out of someone's life when it suits you because it hurts the other person. And to be honest, I don't this person has realised how much it's hurt me: I value my friends and hate losing them or saying goodbye to them, but in some situations you have to let go for your sake.
I personally believe that losing a friend, is painful and it's on a par with a break-up in a relationship because you really do open up to your friends and when it all ends, it's a shock. At least for me it is.
I'll always keep that avenue of friendship open, but there's only so much you can do and ultimately it's a two way thing and much of the work has to be done by the other person.
1 comment:
Rightly said, the other person has to be making the effort too, friendship will only last if both are working together on making it last.
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