Angry Young Women.

Happy Saturday  Thank you for reading my last entry and hope you've all been well. I know I said I wouldn't blog again, but I can't help myself.

Today I'm in a very vicious mood; I'm fed up, sick and tired of a LOT things right now. And yes, that also includes revision as well as many other things. Certain people.
I'm not going to name and shame (though I am soo tempted to, but they know exactly who they are and they read this blog too!) This person has made me sick to the back of my teeth. From openly staring at other women when we're together (in a certain kind of way), to making sly digs about my hair and the way I look. Yes I'm Indian with very curly hair - get over it!
I mean like: bitch please: the way I look is what got me my job!
  It ties into an entry I did earlier (So what's eating you?) and I realise that people really aren't going to change.
No matter how angry we get, how much we cry or beg or how much they hurt us. They're so thick they can't see sh*t through their clouded eyes.
Oh well, we live and learn.

I've entitled this entry "Angry Young Women" because admittedly I am one of these specimens of human life that is becoming more and more common. I'm aware that what I'm about to write about can be interpreted badly and some people take it to heart. If you're one of those people, I'd advise you to stop reading right about now.
What's really aggravating me is something called "Perspective." When I say that, I don't mean some arty farty stuff. I mean how people view each other, how we see things and react to them/people.

I've been described quite often as a "strong woman", who is "opinionated", headstrong, feisty...blah blah. But whenever this has been said to me, there's always been a negative connotation behind it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not a bully or someone who belittles people. I've been brought up by my dad who has constantly told me to never run with the herd, be myself, become a success, has encouraged me to run for activities that will improve my self-confidence and do everything in my power to achieve my dreams.
As a result, I've got no problem with public speaking, I'm very confident when I speak, I've formed my own opinions about a lot of things, I know exactly what I want and how I go about it.
I've noticed that a lot of men feel very threatened by women who have their own mind, are strong, independent, ambitious and can generally hold their own ground. The assumption made about women who run their own business, are in Politics or hold a very high up position in various corporations is that they're either man-eaters, anti-men, scary or just very threatening. They're made to feel that something is wrong with them.
I'll give you an example to clarify my point further. I have an aunt; she's bright, smart, pretty and holds a very good job working for a reputable company. Her whole life she's been told to study hard, work hard, get a degree and get a good job. So she's done all of this and in the process has developed herself into a strong young woman. She lives the kind of lifestyle so many of us aspire to and dream about.
But now, she's reached the age where my family are telling her to get married etc. What's the problem?
No guy wants to marry her because she's got "too much." Errm what is that supposed to mean?

It's like unless women look and behave a certain way, they don't really get a look in romance-wise.
And yes, I blame a lot of the Walt Disney films we used to watch when we were little. Yes, I love Disney films but watch them back: there's a lot of subliminal messages in them.
Eg: Beauty and the Beast, the Beast was an ugly, hideous creature inside and out but he scored Belle purely because he had money - forget true love's kiss, we all know that it doesn't exist. Let's be real, people who are that callous,grumpy and mean do not get the ladies unless they live in a castle and have cash to flash.
Also look how every Disney princess is: she's often helpless when the male protagonist comes "to her rescue" I mean, I might be analysing this a little too much but what does that say about women? It does imply that we can't solve things by ourselves.
Another one: that somehow there is a Prince Charming out there for every woman - cool story bro.

What are we supposed to do?
Women who end up having successful careers are often told when they're young to work hard, get their good job, earn their own good salary, drive a good car, get their own place and build their life.
I don't know  how applicable this is to other women, but I know for quite a few Asian girls, the second our families tell us to get married to "a nice Indian boy" we're supposed to kinda give all of that up and become a "good Indian wife" unless the guy is a reasonably modern, Western type man.
Unfortunately there's a lot of traditional guys out there who expect British Asian girls to become the traditional housewives, wait on them hand and foot and depend on them. If we don't behave like that, boy we're in for a very difficult time indeed. It makes me sick.

If these guys do have a "sense of reality that is their own": it is evidently somewhat warped.  It's important for them to realise that being a first generation, second or third British ethnic minority person is different to what the women in their family or ones they've been exposed to are like.
For a start, the demographics have changed. Times have changed, women are being encouraged to go out in the world and encouraged to make something of themselves: become go-getters and build a good career for ourselves.
When we do this, we get called intimidating, threatening, overly ambitious, ruthless, cold, unfeeling women who are trying to be like men. And on top of that, we have our families nagging for us to get married a.s.a.p before we're "too old."
This is nonsense. There is nothing wrong with women who want this and actually achieve this. Actually, I would prefer it if all girls could be like this and have that mentality instead of wanting to become WAGs, glamour models and other useless careers that put all the women who fought for the right to vote, workplace and sexual equality to shame.

It's very double standard; women are supposed to swoon at the feet of rich men and this is reflected in numerous films, TV shows and music videos. You know what I mean: the minted rapper wearing an Armani suit and sunglasses surrounded by busty women wearing string bikinis on a Miami yacht swooning after him whilst he raps about how he came "from the hood" and now has babes running after him.


It doesn't send a positive message to us. And the thing is, is that we soak this up unconsciously and before we know it: we've applied it to our lives and our way of thinking without us realising it because we're so stupid.
Turn the tables and do you see a rich woman have men running after her? Not unless she's got her arse hanging out and boobies out on show- it just doesn't happen like that. If anything, women in power like that are presented as being overly bitchy, over sexed (or under) rude, ambitious and ruthless whilst powerful men are presented to us as though they're the modern-day Adonis (yes, even the wrinkly ones with saggy bellies!).


It's really annoyed me so much. And what annoys me more is that so many of us swallow these exaggerated ideas of minor, dumb people who coincidentally have pockets bursting with money. None of us are really free thinkers, nor can we even claim to be "free." It's an interesting word: "free" because it's thrown about so often without us even thinking about it. None of us are free if we really think about it and it's weird to think that such a large population is controlled by a handful of people and a few corporations.
So what's my point? Well, to be more aware that the world we live in is full of sh*t and there is immense injustice going on everywhere. Physically, mentally, emotionally - on every level you can think of.
 And to also realise that our perspective of other humans is seriously warped.